Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Let the stress begin

Well, its been a crazy month full of activity.  We started the month with a vow renewal for Jon and I - after all, being together 15 years is kind of a big thing. So with that we celebrated at our church, with our closest friends and family.  After the vow renewal, we took the family to Zehnder's Splash Village for a couple of days of family fun and together time, something we have not had in I don't know how long to be honest.  I can say that it was definitely over due though.  We also celebrated Jon's birthday, Evan's birthday, Easter, Willow making it two years surgery free, and well I think that is all!! I know, that's all?! LOL

Well, we are looking forward to Jonathan's birthday Thursday, then we head to Detroit on Saturday for a benefit concert for the PHF.  We have had some generous sponsors through GM help us get this going, and we can't wait to hear Teen Nation Tour Saturday night!  Should be great fun for a great cause! Jason has worked very hard to get that promoted and going, so it should be a great event.  :)

I am hoping the next month is not too crazy, but I get the feeling things are only going to get crazier as the spring progresses and summer gets closer.  House hunting, summer camps, DC trips, PHF events on the rise, oh how the fun will begin.

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Inadequate

It seems no matter what I try to do for my husbands birthday, it either doesn't go as planned, he figures out the surprise so its not as awesome, or a day like yesterday happens where apparently I just suck as a wife and a human being and it was just an 'okay day'.

I was going to go into more details; but its not worth it. I have already been feeling like I am not doing something right when it comes to being a stay at home, fighting depression as best as possible by getting out at least once a week with friends or having them over for coffee... but it just doesn't seem right.  Then to go to bed feeling like he wasn't happy with how the day went (based on how he described his day to his two sisters vs. how I described my view of it to his mom), it got worse when we woke up and he literally asked me if I didn't get him anything for his birthday because he hasn't gotten things for me in the past. Really?!  I went out of my way to have lunch with him yesterday, brought him flowers (yes flowers and why? because it was a gift he would never see coming! But still showed thought and care), cupcakes from Cold Stone Creamery (instead of his Dairy Queen cake), and I made him whatever he wanted for his birthday dinner.

You see he doesn't need anything right now, and the one thing he wants we can't afford.  So I thought, these things were going to make his day special somehow in a small way.  But I guess once again, I fail. Maybe one day, things will go right for his birthday.

Friday, April 11, 2014

A new start

Well, my plan is to separate myself from the Willow's Wishes blog and allow myself some more creative freedoms in my personal writing.  Many of you may not know this about me, but I used to write poetry.... Shocking I know! I am not saying that this blog will be full of poems, but maybe as I progress in my writing I might be more willing to share my personal poetry.  

I am actually hoping that within the framework of this blog you will see me grow as a person.  I have had a lot of change take place in my life in the last 6 or so months and processing all the information has not been the easiest to handle.  Instead of a busy mom who works out of the house, I am now a less busy mom who gets to stay at home.  I have let go of many of the tasks that I once held for various reasons, but the biggest being my kids.  Having Willow and having gone through a rough first year with her really made me re evaluate my priorities in life.  I would one day still like to actually earn my BA for elementary education, but right now I am busy raising little ones. College will be there, my little ones will not always be little.  

I am looking forward to becoming more involved in our church actually.  I have just finished two book studies that I am quite excited about as well through groups within our church that have really had me rethink how I looked at some things in our life.  While parts of it Jon has also looked at me as if I were crazy!! I think that's okay too. 

So I hope this separation of blogs and more personal style of writing and thoughts will be just as entertaining for you to read and follow as Willows Wishes is important to you.